Wanted: Time ManagerBot

I have been working on this particular bit of writing for over a month now. The original inception was too large, too complex, and the instructions are for simple and short. It’s “only” a job application, and yet I have poured dozens of hours into this puppy. It takes a good eight+ hours to write the dialogue for a single character using the structure I’ve loosely decided upon, and there are eight characters. Theoretically, I should be done already.

But there’s this thing called life. More than that, I have a serious problem with time management. Not that I can’t do it, and not that I don’t attempt to fit writing in when I can. No, the problem lies with the squirmy, babbling, adorable bundle of baby who is my alarm clock. That, plus work, exercise, finishing my last class for my degree, worrying about family, worrying about finances, and trying to make ends meet that are missing several inches each doesn’t leave a lot of time for sitting down to get the words written. Mr. Sir is always on top of anything I have in my hands, and I love his growing curiosity and adventurousness. It does tend to make it difficult to put pen to paper when one or both is in his mouth, or fingers to keys when littler fingers slather slobber all over them. I know there is extra writing time lying around, it’s simply a matter of finding it.

So I have decided I need a Time ManagerBot. Said little droid would let me know when I was wasting time between activities. When it was time to think about food and time to ignore it (it’s ridiculous how much of my day is spent thinking about/preparing/cleaning up after/hating/dreading/defending against food). When I should take a walk. And while I’m thinking about it, it should tell me the weather and pollen count, too, so I don’t have to second-guess my chances of being attacked by random acts of sky and weed/tree/grounds maintenance person. It also needs a happy little chime for a reminder, and an angry, Enterprise-Red-Alert siren for when I just can’t seem to stop what I’m doing. And if it could change the baby’s diaper, or at least hold him down while I do, that would be a major plus, too. As would a brainwave device capable of turning off the worry/anger over things like the tires about to explode off the car, or my broken glasses that have no chance of being replaced in the near future, or the family drama (because it would not be my family without The Drama). Ooh, and it could return phone calls for me, because I either never remember to do so, or I spend an hour on what should be a fifteen-minute conversation.

Any Artificial Life gurus want to make me one? For, you know, free?